thependulumswings

The NBA fashion show and All Star weekend has come and gone.  Team LeBron squeaked by Team Giannis in a defensive thriller 178-164.  In defense (none played) of the NBA the weekend is really more about style than substance anyway.  The atmosphere surrounding one of these weekends is dress up, party, three-point contest, dress up, party, pretend to play a basketball game, dress up, party.  The dearly departed Yogi Berra would call it 90% style and 50% substance we think.  Which got us to thinking.

When Yogi hung up his cleats from catching for his Yankees he eventually wore those cleats and an entire game ready Yankees’ uniform while managing them from the dugout.  This is, of course, just like every other MLB (or MiLB) manager before and after him.  Which got us to thinking.  Why do MLB managers wear the team uniforms?  Respect?  Tradition?  Superstition?  Are they more effective or authoritative if they dress so?  At a minimum we suppose that when they disagree with an umpire’s call its better to kick dirt on home plate with cleats and an easily washable uniform.  Which got us to thinking.

Can you imagine if they dressed like Pat Riley, aka Mr. GQ, the NBA multi time world champ head coach extraordinaire?  Or, could you imagine the cool Riley bouncing out of a dugout in his woven Cole Hahn’s and Perry Ellis tailored suit to turn his cap backwards and spit tobacco juice hither and yon? Heaven forbid that one gelled strand of coiffed hair stray out of place.   Which got us to thinking.  Why do NBA coaches roam court side in thousands of dollars of fine silk threads and pressed shirts?  ‘Why not?’ is our guess.  Aside from sitting, standing, and very occasionally drawing up a play with a Sharpie on a white board there isn’t much physical exertion inside of a climate controlled arena to sweat about.  Which got us to thinking.

Why do NFL football coaches wear coaching shorts and shirts and cleat looking shoes without cleats during practice?  And why do they wear NFL sideline team gear on game days?  Ah, we think we know this one.   NFL practices can be messy, with grass, mud, and sweat and all.  And, the NFL is the ultimate marketing machine.  “Ooh, did you see the new LA Rams shirt that (poster boy) Sean McVay wore on the sidelines?”  “I gotta get me one.”  Which got us to thinking.

Why don’t NHL coaches wear team sweaters and skates while standing behind 20 or so sweaty guys that sit on a cold bench holding a wooden stick waiting for their shift to be called out by men who wear suits and ties?  It’s always an adventure for the coaches try to walk on the ice with dress shoes on.  And, can the NHL afford a tanning bed for them? Milk white skin washes out against milk white ice.  The winters are long in those parts.  Which got us to thinking.

Why do soccer coaches (or managers or trainers or whatever they are called) in Euro leagues wear skinny ties and skinny pants with fitted shirts with their skinny sport coats next to those benches that look like bus stops?  Exact change is needed to board please.  Which got us to thinking.

We think that we might have over thought this.