Life

Need a Haircut?

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Meet Shelley Luther.  She very politely refused to apologize for reopening her North Dallas hair salon.  The judge sentenced her to seven days in jail and a $7,000 fine.

Technically she didn’t break a law.  She refused to obey an executive order.  Then she opted for jail rather than apologize.

This is where we are in America today.  It’s even more shocking that this happened in Texas, and in Dallas.

You can go to a liquor store and practice social distancing, but apparently, if you go to a nail salon you don’t yet know how to do so.

But wait, you beg, “we have to do this because some people might get sick.”  Who said that you have to go to the nail salon? No one.  It’s the ones that said you have no choice that are worrisome.

Small, individually owned, clothing stores have been shut down for two months.  Walmart has been selling groceries(essential) and $14.99 slacks made in China(let that sink in) for those same two months.  One is essential.  The other not.

It’s your individual choice.  It’s your right to go or not to go just like it’s your right to stand in line to buy beer.  If you can stand six feet apart for a badly needed six-pack, you can sit six feet apart for a badly needed trim.

This judge could have easily chosen a less ridiculous route.  It’s all about power, and therefore control.   If you have the power, you have the control.

Her explanation was her desire to feed her kids and pay her employees.  Now she’s out another 7k.  A GoFundMe page has already started for her.  Our guess is it’ll top 100k by end of the day today.

And, that is a good thing to help offset a dumb thing.

If this were an isolated incident it would be one thing.  It’s not.

Stop giving up your rights.  It’s your right.

Let’s Hope So.

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Yesterday CNN ran a story that we feel has not gotten near enough attention.  For our sake, we hope it isn’t as Donald Trump labels it, “fake news.”

We quote CNN.  “373 employees and contract workers at Triumph Foods in Buchanan County, Missouri, have tested positive for coronavirus. All of them were asymptomatic, according to a press release from the Missouri Department of Health and Senior Services.”

Testing at the plant began last week with results coming in over the past few days, the release from DHSS said.  As of April 30, at least 1,500 had been tested, a previous release said.  A first test a week earlier of 707 of the now nearly 1500 resulted in 92 asymptomatic positives.
So what does this all mean?  We hesitate to speculate as there are no health care professionals on BBR’s burgeoning staff, but we will anyway.  The ball bounces a bit below, but stay with it.
1.  In a week’s time the positives went from 92 of 707 to now 373 of 1500.  That’s a pretty aggressive acceleration.
2.  Yet every one of them, we repeat, EVERYONE of them, are asymptomatic.
3.  This almost seems impossible.  373 people of various ages, races, gender, and health conditions, all living near each other are positive asymptomatic.  Unless it isn’t impossible.  And, let’s assume for a minute that it isn’t.
4.  If you believe the CDC’s RO, (pronounced r naught) a mathematical term that indicates how contagious an infectious disease is for Coronavirus, then you can buy into the rapid spread in a contaminated closed environment where many come together.  It’s unfortunately why nursing homes and hospitals are incubators for it.
5.  So, how many other environments that are similar have had a similar spread?  We won’t know that of course until tests are repeatedly and readily available.
6.  But, strong logic would make an argument that its more than a few and likely way more than a few.
7.  So, how many Americans are positive and were asymptomatic in the past or present?  As stated above, we won’t know that of course until tests are repeatedly and readily available.
8.  So, now go back to the first documented case to hit American soil.  On January 19, 2020, a 35-year-old man presented to an urgent care clinic in Snohomish County, Washington, with a 4-day history of cough and subjective fever tested positive.  He wasn’t asymptomatic.  But how many before him were?  We’ll never know.
9.  But if 373 and counting can all hand it off to one another asymptomatically, how many handed it off prior to the above positive symptomatic case?  We’ll never know.
10.  Which begs the question?  How many people in America today are positive?   If you buy into the snowball downhill theory loosely outlined above it could be many.  It could be many as in tens of millions.  Are we speculating?  Yep.  That makes us almost as accurate as the experts it sadly seems.
Dr. Deborah Birx, the U.S. coronavirus response coordinator, dropped the following comment on Fox News on Sunday.  “I think we underestimated very early on the number of asymptomatic cases,” Dr. Birx said. “And I think we’re really beginning to understand there are people that get infected that those symptoms are so low-grade that they don’t even know that they’re infected.”

So if you’ve bought in this far, we have but one more small leap of faith to ask.  How immune then is the herd at this point?  Probably way more than we realize.

Nearly 70,000 deaths in the U.S. is nearly 70,000 deaths too many, make no mistake.  Of course, we hope that the CDC has made no mistake when counting as well.

The country is “reopening.”  If the asymptomatic headcount is way higher than thought maybe the “second wave” or “next spike” will be far less than even the most optimistic projections.

Let’s hope so.

 

Ten Piece Nuggets-Life

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

As society wonders about what it’s future will look like, we decided to serve you ten nuggets as we wander around in life as we know it today.  They’re scattered about your plate randomly, but give us a break.  They’re tasty as always.  We don’t upcharge for home delivery.  And, most restaurants are still closed.

  1.  Did you know that Jeffery Epstein had a private office on the Harvard University campus?  Harvard reportedly gave Epstein his own office on campus in exchange for almost $10 million in donations he gifted to the university between 1998 and 2007.
  2. He was convicted of underage sex crimes in 2008. Epstein reportedly visited the campus more than 40 times after being released from jail in 2010.   Money talks and Harvard apparently is always listening.  Harvard University President Lawrence Bacow said in September of 2019 that the Ivy League institution feels “regret” accepting nearly $10 million in gifts from Jeffrey Epstein.  Regret?  What a heartfelt response.
  3. The Harvard University endowment (valued at $40.9 billion as of 2019) is the largest academic endowment in the world.  Might they consider a $10 million dollar gift to some worthy institution that combats crimes against children, especially sex crimes?  Probably not it seems.
  4. Harvard University will receive nearly $9 million in aid from the federal government through the Coronavirus Aid, Relief, and Economic Security Act, the Department of Education announced last week.  The amounts vary, but almost every school across the land received some as well.  Might they consider a $9 million dollar gift to some worthy institution that combats crimes against children, especially sex crimes?  Probably not it still seems.
  5.  Madam Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi remained comfortably ensconced in her posh northern Cali home last week.  With so many ice cream flavors to choose from who could blame her.  She blocked the House’s attempt to vote remotely on matters before them citing concerns that it would not be a safe way to do so.  Meanwhile, she has been a loud proponent of vote by mail in the upcoming November 3rd general election. Hmm.
  6.  How do you justify a stance that is opposite of a stance on a very similar subject as she does above?  It’s really not that hard for some.  Take Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer.  Please.  “Just because you’re a survivor doesn’t mean that every claim is equal,” she told CNN. “It means we give them the ability to make their case, and the other side as well, and then to make a judgment that is informed.”  Whitmer is apparently an expert on how Tara Reade’s claim of sexual assault differs from Christine Blausey Ford’s claim against the now Supreme Court Judge Kavanaugh.
  7. How does Whitmer find the time to be so well informed on so many subjects given her pressing need to manage Michigan’s coronavirus situation?   Easy.  She just locked down the state another two weeks through May 15.   “Whether you agree with me or not, I’m working to protect your life if you live in the state of Michigan,” Whitmer said, defending her stay-at-home order that extends through May 15. “We’re going to listen to facts and science because we’ve got to get this right.”
  8.  It can’t be lost on anyone at this point that, in general, Republican governors are relaxing restrictions in their states while Democrat governors are extending restrictions.  The original idea was to flatten the curve.  What is it now?  What does an additional two weeks closure do?  Did those same “facts and science” tell you to close down two weeks earlier before Detroit became a hotspot like few others?  And, do you need to treat rural counties the same as metro Detroit?
  9. No one is forced to go into a restaurant.  Individualism and human rights are getting lost in the cause.  And the cause now has blurred lines.  You can wait until a vaccine is available if you wish.  It’s your right.  Several viruses to this day have no vaccine.  It’s still your right.  Does the government attempt to make you more dependent or independent?
  10.  Meanwhile, the NFL continues to have the only “live” sports news worth talking about.  Fresh off of blowout record TV ratings for their draft last week, they will release their regular season schedule this week.  Its plan is to start on time in early September as usual and end as usual in early February with the Super Bowl.  They have contingency plans too, of course.  ESPN estimates that the absence of sports since March will erase at least $12 billion in revenue and thousands of jobs. That total will more than double if college football and the NFL don’t play this fall.
  11. (Lagniappe)  Kim Jung Un is the modern-day North Korean version of Mark Twain.  Rumors of his death were greatly exaggerated. “I, for one, am glad to see he is back, and well!” Trump tweeted.  Whoever coined the phrase “politics makes for strange bedfellows” was prescient.

Cinco de Mayo is but 24 hours away!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Zoom this!

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

The BBR staff is offsite today enjoying a rigorous, but fun, team-building exercise.  We decided as a group that these difficult times no longer need to be so difficult.  Today we reacquaint ourselves. Tomorrow we come together at work in our good old sanitized world headquarters office.  Together.  Not apart.  

Therefore, today’s pearls of wisdom will be short.  We have but a few thoughts and questions.

To those that are screaming that you can’t do anything until we can test everyone, are you going to test everyone every day?  Otherwise, yesterday’s test isn’t worth the swab that went up your nose.

To those that are screaming that we can’t move until we have a vaccine, are you actually going to get the vaccine?  What if one never comes?

To those that say it’s too soon, when is it not too soon?

When was it not a good idea that if you are sick to stay at home?

When was it not a good idea to cover your mouth when sneezing or coughing?

When was it not a good idea to wash your hands regularly?

Most of us would like to have been six feet or more away from most of our coworkers every day prior to this anyway.

If you’re going to a restaurant this weekend you can go to work Monday.

It’s our “new”  new normal.

Pivot this! 

And while you’re at it, Zoom this!

 

 

Together. Apart. Enough.

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Together.  Apart.  We are a family.  We’ll get through this.  Thinking of you during tough times.  Together.

The emails started it.  Now the tv commercials are overrun with it.

Today’s ad agencies sure do have a herd mentality.  Because of that maybe some will fall victim to the thinning of the herd as the economy recovers.  Queue the soft caring music while we deliver a soft and caring message.

Some of the below are real.  Some you can imagine.  We can’t imagine why some are real.  Enough already.

REAL

Burger King

They have a real one.  “Stay Home of the Whopper.”  They are waving their delivery fees right now and they are giving a free Whopper to over 250,000 nurses.  If a Burger King delivery van pulled up in front of your house would your neighbors still talk to you?  And, can you use the words “health care” and “Whopper” in the same sentence with a straight face?

CARMAX

A forgettable car commercial is offering interest-free loans for up to 84 months.  With interest rates nearly zero percent, what are they offering?  Nothing.  Also, you can have curbside pick up.  Skip the test drive, we’ll be sure this car is running great for you.  Can’t you close your eyes and picture Chevy Chase picking up the “family truckster” for the coast to coast Vacation?

Verizon

Verizon “wants you to know during these tough times that “we’re one phone call away.”  Thank goodness.  Can’t you hear it now?  “During this COVID-19 crisis, Verizon is experiencing an unusually high volume of calls.  Your expected wait time is 42 minutes.  Or, if you prefer, please leave your number and a brief message and we’ll be sure to have someone never call you back.”  Queue the terrible “on hold” music.

United Airlines

“Because we are all in this together.”   Really?  Two months ago when my luggage weighed 52 pounds I was on my own.

 

IMAGINED.

Weight Watchers.

Are you struggling with a few extra pounds from being housebound?  We’ve been flattening curves for over 50 years.   Special note-Tampa residents you can get your first week of meals free just like our schools do year-round.

NFL.

We believe in social distancing.   In fact, our rules have insured social distancing by defensive players from our quarterbacks for years.  Apart.  Forever.

Nine Lives Cat Food

Time to take advantage of one?  Enough said.

China

We are the manufacturer and supply chain leader to the world.  What you need when you need it.  And what you don’t need when you don’t want it, too.  Together, unfortunately for us.

Camel (unfiltered).

Time to burn one?  Why not?

Planters

Let our experience going nuts help you through yours.

Life Cereal

Do you even have to ask?

Charmin

We’ve missed you.  Have you missed us?

Hallmark 

We’ve been writing these syrupy hollow lines on cards for years.  Thinking of you during these times.

 

Time for a Zoom meeting.  Friday is only four short days from now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

No Respect Even Way Back When

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Last week we lightened it up a bit on Friday.  The audience was howling in the aisles.  We offered a few examples of how tough life would have been for Rodney Dangerfield to have lived through these times.

Are you kidding?  It was tough to be Rodney during “normal times.”  A dozen examples of how tough it was to get respect way back when are below.

  1.  I come from a stupid family. During the Civil War my great uncle fought for the west!
  2.  I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
  3.  I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent back a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
  4.  My uncle’s dying wish was to have me sitting on his lap. He was in the electric chair.
  5. This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the Fruit of the Loom guys laughing at me.
  6. My wife isn’t very bright. The other day she was at the store, and just as she was heading for our car, someone stole it! I said, “Did you see the guy that did it?” She said, “No, but I got the license plate.”
  7. A girl phoned me and said, “Come on over. There’s nobody home.” I went over. Nobody was home!
  8. If it weren’t for pick-pocketers, I’d have no sex life at all.
  9. I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette.
  10. I went to see my doctor.  I told him once, “Doctor, every morning when I get up and look in the mirror I feel like throwing up. What’s wrong with me? He said, “I don’t know, but your eyesight is perfect.”
  11. What a childhood I had, why, when I took my first step, my old man tripped me!
  12. I worked in a pet store and people kept asking how big I’d get.

    Unless it’s the NFL Draft turn off the TV.

 

 

E Learning Leads to E Commerce

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

The BBR staff consumed adult beverages during a Zoom virtual happy hour last evening.  While doing so it kicked around potential topics for this morning’s article.

One drink led to another.  We had almost decided that it was time to lower the boom on Zoom.  Our business section editor was going to wax eloquently about how there “are people who work, and there are people who get things done.”  She was going to suggest that you get out of the virtual meeting place (isn’t it just a water cooler right in the middle of Al Gore’s internet anyway?) and spend some time strategizing, writing a to-do list, sending a handwritten note to your favorite customer, etc.

Then someone extolled the virtues of it and asked: ” yes, but where would our educational system be without it right now?”  Everyone took a stab. “Good point.”  “Hmm.”  “Let me Google search ‘education news, Zoom, and success.'”

What popped up?  Hillsborough County Florida popped up.  Except it wasn’t about success.  It was about excess.  The county, ever concerned about nutritious meals for its “young uns” doles out “free lunches” for its students.  Who knew that in home schooling didn’t also mean in-home meals?   Drive your car to the drive-through location, wait in line, get handed a bag of food.  It sounds a lot like McDonald’s, except for the ” drive to the first window please” for payment.

“We want to make sure that children actually get the nutrition they need to be successful during the e-learning process,” said Hillsborough Schools Superintendent Addison Davis.

“We had some individuals who made undesired behaviors last week, but we stand ready with new organizational controls you know hats off to operations and the IT department for helping us with this process,” said Hillsborough Schools Superintendent Addison Davis.  Good thing Mr. Davis is a superintendent and not an English teacher during this e-learning process, or any learning process for that matter.

District officials found parents selling the food online and parents who had the food stockpiled in their cars.  Did anyone go to jail?  We digress.

Parents now have to provide their child’s name and school ID number before they can pick up food, and they are not allowed to pick up more than once.  Those are smart thinking additions to the program.  Would it be cheaper to just give them some money?  It would be more efficient, too.  Or, what if the parents actually fed their kids?

So let’s review in an e-learned sort of way.  The government takes in tax dollars.  They use some of it to pay teachers to do their job.  They also buy lunches with it for kids.  They give lunch away.  Parents steal “free lunches.”  Parents sell the food online.  That last step is actually e-commerce.

Maybe there is no such thing as a free lunch, especially if you buy one online.

Last Call

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Several years ago responsible breweries changed their messaging.  “I’ll have another” was replaced by “please drink responsibly.”  Suddenly you needed to “know when to say when.”  Party poopers.

A couple of months ago a virus, with ironically a beer brand given name, shut down the bars altogether.  It shut down a globe actually.

Governments here, near, and far quickly became experts on the enemy that we cannot see.  They continue to tell and told us when and why we could or could not do what, and for how long we could not what.  Did you get the idea that for the most part they meant well but were clueless?  Do you get the idea that, for the most part, they mean well but are still clueless?

Medial experts have attempted to help our leaders understand what happens if we behave in certain ways.  Medical experts have historical, learned, trialed, and anecdotal ideas and possible remedies.  Apparently, none are definitive.  Meanwhile, we needed to flatten the curve through social distancing they said.  Most say we still need to do so.

But now our president has turned the keys over to the governors of our united 50 and encouraged them to turn the economic engines back on as they seem fit.  He really didn’t have the keys to begin with, but was attempting to be a good designated driver for a while.  After all, the states either shut the engine down or kept driving all along.

Today, in very round numbers, a third of the states are past their expected peak in cases, a third are at their peak, and a third will reach theirs next week.

So the very same people who shut down our party are now the same ones charged with making a decision about throwing the next one.  That should make us all confident, or not at all confident.

The need to get back to work and get back to a “new normal” has begun to pull at our purse strings.  You can’t afford beer and pretzels if you can’t work.  The government is doing it’s best Bernie Sanders impersonation.   It’s giving out free money like the last call drinker gives out advice.  And, like Bernie, we need a hair cut too.  But, as Margaret Thatcher once said, “socialism is great until you run out of other people’s money.”  The government printer has to be running low on ink soon.

So, isn’t it time?  One governor who’s state makes a lot of cars even reprised the role of Mother Hen.  She knows best and the answer is “hell no.”  One governor opened up the beaches and a party broke out.  He knows best and the answer is “hell yes.”   Offices, parks, retailers, eventually restaurants, and finally bars will reopen coast to coast.  Like any good office party, it might not be a good idea to be the first one there, nor the last one to leave.

When will we see you again?  Do you know when to say when?  Does anyone?

Neither Snow nor Rain nor Bailout

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Every time the sky is falling our trusty government steps in to help.   It means well we assume.   But, we should expect so much more.  Shouldn’t we?

After 9/11 we got an entirely new department.  The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) was born.  And nearly 20 years later we have tables that look like they were purchased at Walmart that have tubs that look like they were purchased at Walmart lined up to take an image of our belongings.  We have see-through machines that can see through our clothing as well.  And we have TSA employees that would struggle to be hired at Walmart telling us what to do.

Every time they run a security test on their own various screening methods they fail miserably.  Do you feel safer?  Isn’t there a better way?

After the financial crisis, driven largely by dicey mortgage loans packaged as investments, we got the Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act.  Dodd-Frank reorganized the financial regulatory system, eliminating the Office of Thrift Supervision, assigning new responsibilities to existing agencies like the FDIC, and creating new agencies like the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB). The CFPB was charged with protecting consumers against abuses related to credit cards, mortgages, and other financial products. The act also created the Financial Stability Oversight Council and the Office of Financial Research to identify threats to the financial stability of the U.S., and gave the Federal Reserve new powers to regulate systemically important institutions.  Did you get all of that?

The interest rates on credit cards remain 18% plus ten years later.  How is that for protecting consumers against abuses?  Apply for a mortgage and you’ll see at least three times the paperwork to get to the same spot.  You sign and you owe.  You owe and the bank collects.  You default and they take your house.

Now here comes the enemy that we cannot see.  And here comes the United States Postal Service(USPS) with their left hand on the mail and their right hand out.  USPS has lost $69 billion over the past 11 fiscal years. USPS’s total unfunded liabilities and debt ($143 billion at the end of the fiscal year 2018) have grown to double its annual revenue.

“The Postal Service is in need of urgent help as a direct result of the coronavirus crisis. Based on a number of briefings and warnings this week about a critical fall-off in the mail across the country, it has become clear that the Postal Service will not survive the summer without immediate help from Congress and the White House,” House Oversight and Reform Committee Chair Carolyn Maloney (D-N.Y.) said.

So, what happened?  Trump threatened to veto the CARES Act if it included USPS bailout money.  Instead, the government granted them a $10 billion loan.  Nevermind that the USPS has failed on numerous occasions in the last several years to repay a nickel of it’s current $13 billion U.S. government loan.

So should we expect so much more from the government?  Or in this instance should we expect so much less?  The virus is only yet another symptom of the illness that plagues the post office.  Al Gore’s internet created multiple avenues to reach consumers that used to get the solicitations in the mail.  Magazines, catalogs, and newspapers are more virtual than printed.  Bills?  Try online banking, please.  What’s left that Amazon Prime, FedEx, UPS, or countless other delivery services can’t handle?

At a minimum can the USPS deliver three times a week vs. the current six?  If your “revenues” are cut in half why not cut your expenses in half? If your mail comes to a box versus to your house, how often do you go get it anyway?

Why not?  If the government continues to bail out a very tired business model is “why not.”

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.”  Nor a lack of government funding.

Just this one time, when the sky is falling, could we do better by doing less?

 

        

 

Clueless

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

How about Colonel Mustard with the revolver in the Conservatory?  If you’re bored these days and have resorted to board games perhaps you dusted off the old one called Clue.

Clue has six characters and six weapons to consider when deciphering who did it and with what.  It’s played out in nine rooms of a mansion as well.  So who, what, and where give us 6x6x9 or 324 combinations of correct possibilities when trying to solve the mystery.

The mystery of who knew what and when about the where and how of the nasty enemy that we cannot see might have as many combinations.

Just last week President Trump accused the World Health Organization(WHO) of being the “who.”  He basically said that WHO gave cover for China as they misrepresented the cause and severity of this.  And, they still do.  He also said that the monetary price for WHO made the games that they were playing on the world stage far too expensive.  WHO countered as it’s president told Trump that playing political games would only increase the body bag count.

For months now rumors have abounded that this virus was world espionage at its highest and most corrupt level.  Did a Chinese lab accidentally or purposely cause the spread?  Repeatedly we were told emphatically, “NO!”   While looking for the “what” we’re told that their open-air wet markets offer bats for human consumption and that was the culprit.

China released an email last evening that warned the WHO on December 31, 2019 about seven atypical cases of pneumonia in the Wuhan Province.  But, now it’s learned that only 13 of the original 21 cases can be traced back to the market.  Further, the US has been contributing to the research of the lab for highly infectious diseases located a few miles from the market to the tune of $3.7 million per year.  Who knew?  WHO knew?  You’ve heard of the grassy knoll?

Trump wants and asks repeatedly for credit for shutting down the air service to and from China early on.  He feels strongly that this saved many lives.  Yesterday, no less of an expert than Barbara Steisand said that Trump alone was responsible for 20,000 deaths.  She feels strongly otherwise.

Meanwhile, no less of an expert than Dr. Anthony Fauci went on CNN (not Trump’s favorite) and said that Trump could have been more aggressive locking down the country earlier and saving lives. That sounds a lot like Professor Plum with the rope in the studio to us.  Of course, as late as leap year day, February 29, 2020, Fauci was telling the public that there was nothing to worry about as it posed no threat to the US public at large.

So, in the blame game we are approaching 324 combinations as well.   Yet, we don’t even know who has had it or who has it, yet finger-pointing has reached hot spot levels.  And, the curve is either flattening or not.

In the game Clue if you take a guess at the who, what, and where, and you get it wrong you’re eliminated.  The fictitious victim of foul play is Dr. Black.

In the real world, our guess is the next nonficticious victim will be Dr. Fauci.   And our guess is President Trump in the White House Oval Office with verbal blunt force.  “You’re Fired!”  Our clue comes from Trump the master tweeter who added a #FireFauci to his last evening’s barrage.

Meanwhile, we are being asked to stay in our room.  At least the game has nine rooms to move around in.

Perhaps the game should be renamed Clueless.  Of course, this is no game.