Life

Happy Shwanza and New Year, Part 2

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Yesterday we laid out the way the first half of 2023 will go.  Today we tackle the last half.  The glass is half full.

July

Prez Biden celebrates our nation’s independence on July 4th with a socially distanced, mask-wearing picnic on the WH lawn.  He reminds America that he was one of the original signers of the Declaration back in 1776.  Aaron Judge suffers a torn patella tendon rounding third on his 49th HR trot, ending the Yankees season and his chase for the single-season all-time record.  One hundred and seventy-five billion in, Zelenskyy gives Biden a stiff arm as China agrees to rebuild Ukraine for considerations TBD.

August

Bette Midler fills in for vacationing WH Press Secretary Joy Behar and actually sings her inept responses.  Texas Governor Greg Abbott files paperwork with the US Government announcing the state’s intent to secede from the country.  Marc Zuckerberg resigns from FB and joins Elon Musk at Twitter sending the lib community into mass hysteria.  Back in March, the National Weather Service predicted 21 named storms by 8/31.  To date, only two have been named.  Kamala says, “climate change is all about climate change and climate change is so bad that it is preventing storms from being formed in this climate.”

September

The San Diego Padres end the MLB season with 111 victories and secure home-field throughout the playoffs.  AOC intros a bill to change Labor Day’s name.  She says, “it’s misogynistic to people who identify as having given birth.”   Tom Brady makes his debut as starting quarterback for the Las Vegas Raiders.  LeBron James tells Cleveland, “I’m coming home for the third time” as the Lakers work out a trade with the Cavaliers for him.  23andMe outs Pete Buttigieg as Pee Wee Herman’s nephew.

October

Canadian PM Trudeau signs a bill banning all guns in Canada.  Stacy Abrams is appointed as Georgia State Election Commissioner.  She pledges to count every vote cast in the great state at least once.  The Houston Astros defeat The NY Mets four games to two and are back-to-back WS Champions.  The buzz in H Town is louder than the one Jose Altuve never wore.  All J6 prisoners are freed when video surfaces of a high-eye-browed Nancy Pelosi saying it was her greatest ruse ever.  Home Depot severs its association with Paul Pelosi the next day saying Nancy’s revelation was like getting hit over the head.

November

Canadian geese no longer migrate and overrun Toronto, Montreal, and Vancouver.  The FBI finally releases the last of the JFK files.  They are heavily redacted but have the names Carlos Marcello, Lucky Luciano, and Giuseppe Magliocco up, down, and all around the documents.  Mitch McConnell announces that he had corrective Lasik surgery.  Trading in shares of eyeglass maker companies was halted on Wall St for the remainder of the day.

December

Joe Biden formally announces for 2024.  He beamed, ” Yes, I am running for a second term as Vice President.  Much has been done, but is much is, um, is, well you know the deal man.”  Putin invades Poland with the three tanks he has left.  A ceasefire is proclaimed the next day.  Biden vows to rebuild all of Poland and sends Kamala over there to announce the aid.  She opens her remarks, “It’s so great to be here at the North Pole.”  Santa shakes his head but saddles up the reindeer and rolls the sleigh a day early to beat the next bomb cyclone.

 

We have a lot to look forward to.  See you next year!

 

 

Happy Shwanza and New Year

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Hopefully, all of your recent days were merry and bright.  Or, as Nancy Pelosi wished all, “Happy Shwanza!”

Now we march on to 2023.  Surely it will return us to some normalcy?  We’re due since 2020, 2021, and 2022 were duds.

Our new crystal ball (up 22% in cost year over year) gives us a look into months one through six of 2023 today.

January

The weather moderates as the December “bomb cyclone” moves out and the climate(always) changes to seasonal lows and highs.  Adam Schiff gets tossed off of every committee he is on as the Elephants take the House.  Michigan becomes National College Football Champions as they beat Georgia 33-28.  Elon Musk offers the job of CEO of Twitter to one Donald J. Trump.  Two NBC reporters are hospitalized for high blood pressure.  Trump announces that the offer is really “fake news.”

February

Adam Schiff announces that he’s resigning from the House to run for the Senate seat vacated by Diane Feinstein just before she turns 90.  The Philadelphia Eagles make the Cincinnati Bengals the bridesmaids for the second year in a row, 35-34.  Joe Biden exits stage left after prompting from Dr. Jill and after another left-leaning speech while still carrying the microphone.  The Fed realizes that they’ve gone too far too fast and shocks Wall St with a quarter-point rate cut.  The Dow goes up 898 points that day.

March

The Biden administration mandates mask on airplanes again. Joe exempts the crew and all passengers on Air Force One.   A Southwest spokesperson comments, “it matters not to us as we don’t fly anyway.”  Dr. Fauci takes the fifth on all House questioning, rolls up his sleeve for a fifth booster, then goes home and drinks a fifth.  Mitch McConnell puts together a little Ukraine relief bill offering 50 billion dollars. Volodymyr Oleksandrovych Zelenskyy says, ” I am saddened at the paltry amount of aid offered at this critical time. Dismayed, disillusioned, and disappointed might better reflect my feelings.”  The transitory inflation has a birthday.

April

Elon Musk puts in a hostile offer to buy NBC.  The NCAA Final Four is held in Houston and the hometown # 1 seeded Cougars cut down the nets after beating the #3 seed, North Carolina.  Tulsi Gabbard is in Florida as Ron DeSantis’ announces that he is running for President in 2024 and the rumor mill runs wild.  Joe Biden wishes everyone a Happy Fourth of July before going on an Easter egg hunt on the South Lawn.  LIV Tour member Patrick Reed is disqualified at The Masters for using a ball filled with tiny superballs.

May

Karine Jean-Pierre, the first black lesbian female WH press secretary, steps down.  When asked by reporters why, she flips pages in her binder and says, “I’ll have to circle back with you on that.”   An early summer “bomb cyclone” sweeps across the US spiking temps 25-30 degrees above normal.  Pete Buttigieg proposes that we tear up the current Interstate System, labeling the entire 46,876 miles of the highways as racist.  He also denies being related in any way to Pee Wee Herman.  KJP’s replacement, Joy Behar, assures us that the border is secure. The Yankee’s Aaron Judge hits his major league-leading 33rd home run on May 30th putting him on pace to hit 82.

June

As the calendar flips the Yankees trail Baltimore for first in the NL East by 5.  Oregon legalizes everything.  The Dow rolls on and reaches a two-year high at 36,743.  Joe Biden reassures America that the southern border is secure and recognizes Mexican officials for doing their part, “I want to especially thank the Royal Canadian Mounties.”  Arizona finishes counting votes in the 2022 Gubernatorial race.  Paul Pelosi hammers out a deal to become the hardware spokesperson for Home Depot.

The very accurate predictions for July through a December to remember will be published tomorrow or Friday.

 

 

 

 

Wring Ring

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

You can’t ring in the new until you first wring out the old.

Today we provide some facts, falsehoods, truisms, and blatant lies that struck a chord with us in 2022.  We clear the deck for our 2023 predictions next week.

It seems like America is ready to dump 2022 on its ear as well.   A Fox News(always fair and balanced) poll had 52% of Americans calling 2022 a bad year, while 36% called it good.  Somehow 12% had no strong feelings or too few brain cells to decide.  At least these numbers were better than the two previous Covid-marred years.

It’s hard to pick THE story of the year, so we won’t try.  Several come to mind and frankly, none are for the better.

Inflation went from transitory to Biden calling for it to last until at least the end of 2023.  Russia can’t shoot straight and Ukraine can get enough of newly printed US money.

The Dow Jones went from 36,338 on 12/31/21 to 32,758 as of yesterday, or minus a smooth 10%.  The NASDAQ is way worse.

The housing market went from bonkers to stagnant as interest rates for conventional 30-year mortgages doubled from 3.05 to 6.32%.

The border is now a border in name only.  When you illegally cross borders you used to be an illegal alien.  Karine Jean-Pierre Claudia Von Damme Pepe Le Phew had some reassuring words for us yesterday.  “It would be wrong to think that the border is open.  It is not open.”

The Republicans gained control of the House 222 to 213 in November, or December when all of the votes were finally counted.  If you allowed everyone in America to vote that identifies as “nonwhite” only the 435 districts would have elected 347 Democrats to 88 Republican seats.

It’s all about power.  It’s why the Dems have the sieve wide open from Brownsville, TX to San Diego, CA.  It’s always all about power.

New York Mayor Eric Adams is starting to get it.  He said yesterday “our shelter system is full, and we are nearly out of money, staff, and space.  Truth be told if corrective measures are not taken soon, we may very well be forced to cut or curtail programs New Yorkers rely on.”

Government spending escalated regardless of what Biden’s drivel on Twitter espouses.  It’s interesting sickening to note that under Nancy Pelosi’s tenure as Speaker of the House over 40% of the federal debt accumulated since 1776.  And, 1776 is no typo nor is it her birth year as it might seem.

Like the WH occupants over time, she had many opportunities to hammer out a better US budget and chose otherwise.  Too soon?

It looks like a new way to look at Covid vaccinations is finally being heard.  Elon helped with that.  After all, it once was hard to be anti-vax even if there is no vax in reality.   Thankfully Biden’s prediction in early 2022 of a “winter of death” for the unvaccinated didn’t materialize.

Hunter Biden and the FBI might have some explaining to do soon.  Elon also helped with that.

Education costs continue to soar as well.  Why?  One survey found that since 2000 public school enrollment is up 7% through 2021 while administration personnel is up 97%.  If the entire Department of Education at the federal level closed would anyone miss it? That little red schoolhouse on the top of the hill brought us a long way.

Maybe Harvard could pay a scholar such as Elizabeth Warren 400k a year to teach a class on why school is so expensive.

Mass shootings continue to pull at our heartstrings.  Shrills on TV and journalists(there aren’t any anymore really) harumph the gun control lines after each one.  Meanwhile, fentanyl and street violence kill more of our youth that mass shootings by many many times to one.

All isn’t gloomy though.  Sports continues to be a great escape.

The World Cup for three weeks was riveting and the final left amateur watchers like this writer speechless.  Messi and Mbappe gave us a show-stopper for the ages.

The Houston Astros proved in 2017 that cheaters do win and from then on proved that they are the MLB franchise others are chasing crowned by a 2022 playoff and WS run that impressed all.

The Los Angeles Rams paralleled the stock market though.  They won the Super Bowl in February and are a svelte 4-10 this year.

We’d tell you about the greatness of the 2022 NBA and NHL seasons, but we have no idea.

This brings us to 2023.  We have no idea what is in store.  But, undeterred, we’ll take a stab at our predictions by month for it next week.

Meanwhile, enjoy the blizzard.  The one constant in life is that damn climate is always changing.

 

 

What’s in a Word?

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

Way back when way down yonder in New Orleans a weekly football rag was devoured by rabid NFL/Saints fans.  It was called Gridweek.

Its tagline was “Gridweek tells it like it is.”  And for a fledgling football franchise that was run as poorly off of the field as it ran on the field “like it is” was straight pain with no Novocaine.

Gridweek delivered the news with no spoon full of sugar to make the medicine go down, the medicine go down.  Of course, that was when we didn’t sugarcoat matters at hand.

And, it was before we knew how bad sugar was for you.  So, many healthy folks switched to salads and the like.  And, now we get our info/news/talking points delivered to our internet-connected devices as a word salad.

George Carlin saw this coming long ago.  He detailed the obvious in a humorous way better than anyone.  And, this two-minute must-see video takes us through wars that caused “shellshock” to “post-traumatic stress disorder” with steps along the way.

He said Americans don’t like reality and have trouble handling the truth.  Isn’t that the truth?

Sweeping the out-of-control national debt under the rug yearly as it grows nearly geometrically is but one example.

How about when abortion was an abortion?  Then it became pro-choice.  A few years passed and it was women’s rights, then women’s wellness, then women’s healthcare, and today it’s women’s reproductive rights.

It’s so much softer as George said.  And, to boot, you can have Planned Parenthood helping you along the way.  None of the above sounds like you end up being a parent, but we digress.

A fib, a falsehood, and a “big fat lie” became “a little fib” or ” a little white lie.”  Is a “white lie” racist?   We digress again.  Now it’s “misinformation.”  “Misinformation” has morphed into actually anything that anyone says that you disagree with.

This misinformation caused such harm ten years back that we created “safe spaces.”  Safe spaces are more word salad. I don’t like what you’re saying, go away.

Have you ever seen a safe space?  Been to one?  Created one?  Apparently, they are quite mobile, too.

You don’t die anymore either.  You “pass away.”  Father Time remains undefeated though.  Everyone (except maybe one) and everything that has walked on terra firma has died or will die.

Sins were once venial and mortal.  Of course, that was when the Catholics thought God could park the people he was undecided about in purgatory.  That’s the one and the only thing that the Vatican has done right in the last 25 years.  It dumped purgatory.   Now it’s either the stairway to heaven or the steps down to hell.

Everyone sitting in limbo, get out!  That bum rush for the door must have looked like our southern border does today.

Speaking of “bums” or “hobos,” well you can’t speak of them anymore. Red Skelton would be out of a job.  They’re homeless now, or underserved, or have food insecurities.

If you had food insecurity you used to be able to get “food stamps.”  No more.  The Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) is the largest federal nutrition assistance program going.  Notice it’s nutrition now, not food.   You can get fed in a “SNAP.”

You can put lipstick on a pig too, but it’s still a pig.

You can pour so much window dressing on a word salad that it makes the lettuce float.

But, it’s still a word salad world and we’re all just living in it.

 

Questions as Answers

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

You’ve got questions.  You’re not supposed to answer a question with a question.  We did anyway.

Q.  Does it seem like Elon Musk is three steps ahead of everyone else?

A.  Does it seem like Elon Musk is four steps ahead of everyone else?

Q.  Is this the loudest fight for free speech in your lifetime?

A.  Do you need to reread the answer to question no. 1 above?

Q.  Haven’t the conspiracy theorists been leery of having a chip implanted in their bodies so that others can control how we think and who we are?

A.  Is (as Musk says it is) Neuralink, launched in 2016 with the goal of developing a chip that would allow the brain to control complex electronic devices and eventually allow people with paralysis to regain motor function, ready to begin testing in humans?

Q.  Why did Elon call out Tim Cook publicly on Twitter for pulling 17 million in advertising?

A.  Do you, once again, need to reread the answer to question no. 1 above?

Q.  Does Apple have, as Ricky Riccardo would say to Lucy, some esplaining to do for aiding China by turning off the airdrop feature in this lockdown?

A.  Does Apple’s Cook deliver the iPhone 14 on time and in the quantity desired because of the terrible mess over there, or is his goose cooked?

Q. Does telling people that you are glad that you have tested positive but have mild symptoms because you are vaxxed and boosted make you feel better about your decision?

A.  Does telling people you’re glad you wore a condom even though your significant other is pregnant make you feel better?

Q.  Did Joe Biden walk off of the stage yesterday with the microphone in hand still in the ready-to-talk position?

A.  Did someone forget to type “put down microphone after speech” on his note cards?

Q.  Did Canadian PM Trudeau say “Everyone in China should be allowed to protest?  We will continue to ensure that China knows we stand for human rights?”

A.  Didn’t Trudeau send out his police to arrest truckers protesting in Canada last year?

Q.  Is Mitch McConnell really all in on giving more money to Ukraine?

A.  Is there even a war being fought in Ukraine, or is this the biggest money laundering scheme since, well, ever?  How much money are all of the EU nations combined giving?

Q.  Is Die Hard a Christmas movie?

A.  Why are we having this debate anyway?

You want answers?  We have questions.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ten Piece Nuggets

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

It’s been a while, but the recipe never changes and the spice is quite right.

  1.  Paul Pelosi did the right thing.  Six months after going out and getting hammered and stopped for a DUI, he had sense enough this time to stay home and get hammered.  Too soon?
  2. His wife Nancy Pelosi forgot to call the National Guard on January 6th back in 2021 for protection.  Apparently, she forgot to call Paul to set the ADT alarm at home.  Next time, Better Call Paul.  Still, too soon?
  3. Or did a silent alarm go off and she ignored it thinking it was false like her eyelashes, teeth, and mammary glands?  This has to be an eyebrow-raising experience for her, like many of her facelifts.  Definitely, too soon.
  4. You can expect a torrent of narrative that spews that the Republican’s call to arms, aggressive behavior, assault on our democracy, and fill-in-the-blank caused this break-in. There is no way this was just a homeless, deranged individual who descended on San Francisco due to their way too tolerant position towards abhorrent behavior is there?  Tis the midterm season.
  5.  Are the rats jumping ship?  There are less than two weeks till the aforementioned midterm exams elections. Democratic Ohio Senate candidate Rep. Tim Ryan, who is trailing in the polls to Republican rival JD Vance, called for the next generation of leadership to take hold of the party when asked if he thought Biden should run for a second term in 2024.  Ouch.  In Ohio, some of the latest polls show just 37% of voters approving of his job performance as president.    Ryan hasn’t invited Biden to join him on the campaign trail.  Ryan has no coattails to run on as the Emporer has no clothes.
  6. Speaking of no clothes, is there any truth to the rumor that Paul Pelosi and the alleged assailant were both only clad in their underwear when police arrived?? Doubtful?  Salacious?    Blame Trump?
  7. Madonna found inspiration from the Paul and alleged assailant’s scantily clad rumors.  The 64-year-old Material Girl wants so desperately to remain relevant that she decided to post a series of topless pictures on her Instagram account.  We’re not here to judge, but a free consultation from Nancy’s plastic surgeon wouldn’t hurt.  The scalpel recommended might, however.  Her impressive 18.5 million followers can’t unsee it.
  8.  Skin, skin, skin.  The next thing you know taxpayer money will be funding drag queen shows at public middle schools.  Wait.
  9.  If you don’t recognize the name Kari Lake, you soon will.  She’s the hard-charging Republican candidate for Governor of Arizona.  She is at ease in front of cameras, well-spoken, effectively acerbic, and unafraid to spar.  A Liz Chaney-led PAC sent $500k to her Democratic opponent to run ads against Ms. Lake.  Lake sent Chaney a letter.  It begins, “Thank you for your generous in-kind contribution to my campaign. Your recent television ad urging Arizonans not to vote for me is doing just the opposite. Our campaign donations are skyrocketing and our website nearly crashed from traffic after the attack ads.”
  10.  Elon Musk spent $44 billion to return Twitter to a free speech vessel.  He would like to thank everyone who bought an electric car from his Tesla company which received billions and billions “free” from many of the same car-owning taxpayers to get started.  It sounds like a win-win-win for him.    Some Twitter employees don’t feel the same way about themselves.
  11. (Lagniappe) There is no truth to the rumor that Musk offered to buy the FBI from Zuckerberg but was emphatically turned down.

Boo!

Boom Boom’s Life Lessons #7.

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

By request from not one, but two readers, we share the previously published article again for your perusal.  It must be sales meeting time for some.  We hope you’ll enjoy it.

 

One of the many gifts that Boom Boom gave us was the torrent of quips about how one leads one’s life.   He could say so much by saying so little.   A statement at just the right moment resonated in my young, eager eardrums.  How I interpreted or applied it was up to me.  No more words were spoken because no more words were needed.

Boom Boom bought a new car when, and only when, the need arose.  He bought American.  And, he bought Oldsmobiles.  Mom would get the new car and hand Boom Boom the keys to the old one.   He included me in the conversations with the car salesmen and management from a very young age.

In the mid-sixties an on and off again negotiation with the local dealership involved us walking out twice and resuming the deal-making the next day and then the day after.  Finally, exhaustively, the terms were agreed to on a new Jetstar 88.  “We’ll clean it up for you and you can pick it up tomorrow Mr. Johnston,” said the exasperated car salesman.

After his work and our dinner the next evening we drove in the old trade-in Olds to pick up the new Olds.  After the final paperwork was signed we joyfully opened the doors to get into the new shiny ride.  One problem.  There were no floor mats.  “Where are the floor mats,” Boom Boom inquired.  “Mr. Johnston, there were none in the car as it was offered to you.  Floor mats will be an extra $36, said the soon-to-be more exasperated car salesman.”  “Keep the car,”  Boom Boom evenly retorted.   “Let’s go,” he said to mom and I.   Silence abounded.  And, off we drove in the old Jetstar 88 back home.  The silence was still plentiful well into the evening.

The next evening our phone rang.  Boom Boom answered.  Boom Boom listened.  Then, Boom Boom spoke.   We could only hear his side of the conversation.   “So, now you want to include the floor mats?”  Pause.  “Ok, well, tell your manager that I now need another $150 off of the car for my inconvenience in addition to the floor mats.”  Long pause.  “Tell him thank you.”

“Let’s get the car,” he said.  Mom decided to drop him and me off and head back home.  She may have had a wee bit of buyer’s fatigue.  As dad and I waited for them to bring the car around to the front he looked at me(all of six or seven years old) and said, “Never be afraid to walk away from a negotiation.  Never.”

The new car smell filled my nostrils on the ride home.  The lesson learned fills my mind to this day.

 

Ten Piece Nuggets

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

You’ve waited far too long.  Nuggets, all ten, are spiced just right for your consumption below.

  1. During a portion of an interview with CBS News aired on Monday’s edition of “Red and Blue,” Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-VT) warned that while abortion is an important issue, Democrats “have got to do more” on the economy.  How much more?  Haven’t they done enough?  That Inflation Reduction Act should have done the trick by now.
  2. In a quickly-reversed policy move, the web’s leading payments processor, PayPal, announced it would NOT deduct $2,500 from users who violate its acceptable use policy, which includes bans on spreading “misinformation,” “hate,” or anything else the company deemed “unfit for publication.”  Wall St. and Main St. took notice of the nonsense.   Apparently, free speech would have cost $2500 until smarter people got involved.
  3. Electric truck and SUV maker Rivian Automotive said on Friday that it is recalling nearly all of its vehicles because the company had improperly installed fasteners, which could cause the loss of steering control.  It is their third recall since launching in 2020.  Wall St and Main St took notice of the incompetence.  The start-up’s stock is off 67% year to date after soaring in 2021.
  4.  The Chicks who used to be called The Dixie Chicks endorsed Beto O’Rourke Saturday night at a concert north of Houston.  It didn’t go over too well.  O’Rourke. who trails incumbent Greg Abbott by nearly double digits. was audibly booed louder than a smattering of claps.  Isn’t “The Chicks” an offensive name as well?
  5. During an appearance on FNC’s “Fox News Sunday,” Georgia Democratic gubernatorial nominee Stacey Abrams said she opposed restrictions on abortion.  She stated that “arbitrary standards of timelines ignore the medical reality that it is a fallacy we know exactly when a pregnancy starts.”  If she fails again at running for office, maybe she can enter the field of medical research as she has a bit to learn.
  6. Sixty-two percent of voters say President Joe Biden’s economy is deteriorating just 29 days from the midterm elections, a Civiqs poll found Monday.  People, we are told over and over, vote with their wallets first and foremost.  Maybe Bernie is right.  But, he’s too far left to do what is right by the government to help the economy.  What is that?  Stay the hell out and stop printing money would be a great start.
  7. JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon agrees. He stated that he believes that the U.S. is “likely” to enter a recession “six, nine months from now” in a Monday CNBC interview.  Was the Fed too late getting started and will they be too late slowing down?  BBR has no economists on staff, but we’re guessing that the answers are yes and yes.
  8. Twitter didn’t want to be outdone by PayPal.  It took down a tweet posted by the Florida Surgeon General Dr. Joseph Ladapo, “Today, we released an analysis on COVID-19 mRNA vaccines the public needs to be aware of. This analysis showed an increased risk of cardiac-related death among men 18-39. FL will not be silent on the truth.”  Twitter wanted the good doc to be silent.  But, then it reversed its course and reposted it later Monday.  Maybe Stacey Adams could go to work for Twitter if her medical research career doesn’t work out.
  9. Across the pond, The Telegraph, the country’s best-selling broadsheet(the largest newspaper format and is characterized by long vertical pages), published an article by Associate Editor Camilla Tominey suggesting that “Biden’s qualities for the Oval Office are almost non-existent.”  They called old Joe “useless and nasty.”  Ouch.  Deceased Rep. Jackie Walorski would have objected to such harsh words.  Where’s Jackie? Two words.
  10. Five years after women’s stories about him made the #MeToo movement explode, sexy Harvey Weinstein, the bad actor, is going on trial in the city where he once was a fixture at the Oscars.  Already serving a 23-year sentence for rape and sexual assault in New York, the 70-year-old former movie mogul faces four counts of rape and seven other sexual assault counts involving five women.  What a low-life guy he was, and always will be.

 

Ten Piece Nuggets

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

It’s been a while and you’ve likely got a hankering.  Ten Piece Nuggets are served below for the same low low pre-Putin Biden inflation prices.  As a bonus, we’re going to take it easy (somewhat) on Cali today.

  1.  One of our favorite government workers, Rep Eric Swalwell tweeted prior to a possible Texas rolling brownout on July 10th, “Texas.  Where Republicans provide plenty of energy to control your body, but no energy to control your thermostat.”  Yesterday he tweeted, “It’s time to rally, Cali.  We all need to do our part to help avoid power outages this week.  Before 4 pm pre-cool your home, after avoid using major appliances and turn your thermostat to 78 degrees or higher.”  Perhaps his own energy is misguided.
  2.  Two weeks after Liz Cheney took a victory tour on several networks after getting slaughtered by a 2-1 margin in the Wyoming primary she has vaporized into the background.  What do she and Swalwell have in common?  Too much.
  3.  After getting panned coast to coast for two weeks for the student loan forgiveness trillion dollar bailout, Biden went on offense. And, as Carrie Bradshaw would say, “just like that,” the narrative was changed.  “All Republicans are a serious threat to our democracy.”  “MAGA Republicans are a threat to our democracy.”  Some Republicans are a threat to our democracy.”  Well, at least all of them or either fascists or semi-fascists.
  4. Do Americans even know what fascism means?  It means “a political philosophy, movement, or regime that exalts nation and often race above the individual and that stands for a centralized autocratic government headed by a dictatorial leader, severe economic and social regimentation, and forcible suppression of opposition.”
  5. Did America get that vibe from Biden himself, all clench-fisted, podium pounding, and draped in red and Marines last week?  If we weren’t so dumb we might be insulted.  Maybe a poll can enlighten us.
  6. Meanwhile, a Rasmussen Poll released yesterday shows us that 60% of Americans feel like Joe Biden and his family have peddled influence and greatly profited by his positions over time in government.  Maybe it finally dawned on us after Mark Zuckerberg says Facebook restricting a story about Joe Biden’s son during the 2020 election was based on FBI misinformation warnings.
  7. How strong is it when 60% of America agrees on something?  In the most lopsided election victory since 1936, Ronald Reagan was re-elected to the presidency with 59% of the popular vote versus Walter Mondale in 1984. Reagan carried every state except Mondale’s home state of Minnesota and the District of Columbia.  That’s how strong it is.
  8. Nine illegal immigrants drowned in separate incidents over the Labor Day weekend in south Texas.  Chicago was worse.  Fifty-five people were shot and 11 killed in the three-day span.  Thankfully, none were shot with one of those terrible assault rifles in the city in the state of Illinois that has strict gun control laws.
  9. As Covid seems to be fading into the backdrop like Liz Cheney, the White House senses that America is vaccine weary.  So the Biden Administration put forth a new selling point Tuesday.  “View it as a first annual shot, akin to the annual flu shot,” they said.  It just took us two years to admit it.
  10. That record warmth in the Gulf of Mexico might yet get climate change advocates in their La-Z-Boy’s to remotely change channels to Jim Cacciatore and the Weather Channel before the season tuckers out.  Earl became just the second named hurricane of the 2022 Atlantic season late Tuesday.  It won’t swim in the gulf though.  A gradual turn to the northeast is predicted for Thursday sending the weak system to a tragic overwater death in the northern Atlantic.  Tic toc goes the no American landfall 2022 hurricane clock.

It’s already Hump Day.  Back to the salt mines.

Y’all Come Back Now

Posted on by thependulumswings staff

A lot has changed since 1962, and nowhere more so than in California.

Back then the Clampetts, a poor, backwoods family from the hills of the Ozarks, moved to posh Beverly Hills, California, after striking oil on their land.  They struck it rich when ole Jed, who could barely keep his family fed, was shooting at some food.

And, wouldn’t you know it, up from the ground came a bubbling crude.  Black gold, Texas tea they called it.

His kinfolks told patriarch Jed that California was the place to be.  So he packed up his 1921 Oldsmobile Model 46 truck, powered by a four-cylinder, V8, 43 hp motor, and headed to Beverly.

Non-U.S. migrants are still very welcome there, but migration within the United States has reversed course.  Many more American citizens are headed out of California than in.  They may not like Texas tea, but they like Texas.

Would Jed, Granny, Elly May, and Jethro still be welcomed there?  Possibly so, but they’d need to make a few changes to be accepted.

For starters, Jed would need to leave his gun behind in Missouri.  Gun-free zones are all the rage now, plus assault rifles are greatly frowned upon.

Also, shooting at a critter to eat would greatly upset the PETA folks.  And, nowadays there is such a thing as a free lunch, especially if you look as ragtag as they did.

But most importantly that 1921 combustion engine, fossil fuel burning truck must go.  Acting progressively California lawmakers last week moved to require all new vehicles in the state to run on electricity by 2035.

But, it will come in handy for a while prior, especially for the next week.  Likely due to climate change, most of Cali is enduring a heat wave that will greatly tax the electrical power grid.

The good Gov. Gavin Newsom took time away from planning for his 2024 Democratic Presidental nominee run on Wednesday to sign an executive order that will allow the state to try to ramp up electricity supply.

The California Independent System Operator(CISO) has warned that stress on the energy grid could lead to blackouts and called for consumer conservation for the next several days.  CISO is asking consumers to avoid using major appliances and charging electric vehicles between 4 p.m. and 9 p.m.

To summarize (see what we did there?) Cali doesn’t have enough electricity during the heat wave to service electric-powered needs that will be legally required to reverse global warming by forcing electricity upon its faithful.

The Clampetts need not worry about running the washing machine for clean clothes though.  Granny uses a good old washboard.

And, they have that old cement pond out back to keep cool in.

The last one leaving California, please turn out the lights.  Of course, if it’s between 4-9 PM they might not be on.

Y’all come back now, ya hear?