Way back when before everyone became a victim of some terrible social injustice or, even worse, inequality, there was comedy. We used to poke fun at ourselves.
Way back when we also cut down trees to staple paper together into magazines. One monthly that came to America’s door was The Reader’s Digest. It had many regular features. One of them was called Laughter, The Best Medicine. That’s so right.
Way back in 1984, Ronald Reagan asked Don Rickles to perform at his inauguration. Rickles job? His job was to cut down Reagan, First Lady Nancy, and his cabinet members right in front of them.
He did. How insensitive was it? They howled. The more the better was how insensitive it was.
Could Henny Youngman, Rodney Dangerfield, George Carlin, and Don Rickles even perform today? God, we hope so. And God, while we are at it, we could really use a line or two.
Henny, you’re up!
I said to my wife, ‘Where do you want to go for our anniversary?’ She said, ‘I want to go somewhere I’ve never been before.’ I said, ‘Try the kitchen.’
I’m offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
It’s not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.
Rodney, try to get some respect!
I asked my old man if I could go ice-skating on the lake. He told me, “Wait till it gets warmer.”
My mother had morning sickness after I was born.
A hooker once told me she had a headache.
I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette.
When I was born the doctor took one look at my face, turned me over, and said, “Look, twins!”
George Carlin takes center stage.
“As it stands right now, I lead Richard Pryor in heart attacks, two to one. 
However, Richard still leads me, one to nothing, in burning yourself up.”
“Have you ever noticed that you never get laid on Thanksgiving? I think it’s because all the coats are on the bed.”
“Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do ‘practice’?”
“How is it possible to have a civil war?”
And, last, but not least, Don Rickles!
[to Robin Williams, upon seeing his forearms] “I’ve never met an ape.”
“Orson Welles, this great man was married to a great many women. They’re all flat now.”
“Is that your wife, sir? Jesus… what was it, a train?”
“Bob Hope couldn’t be here tonight, he’s looking for a war.”
In summary, perhaps Rickles said it best, “You know, every night when I go out on stage, there’s always one nagging fear in the back of my mind. I’m always afraid that somewhere out there, there is one person in the audience that I’m not going to offend!”
himself is quite the expert on climate change (formerly known only as global warming) as well. As a former VP, though, his expertise on the climate falls short of current VP Harris’ handle on the US and now the Ukrainian border, but we digress.
Think Jen Psaki for inspiration. She “unanswers” three or more questions in a row daily.
We’ve said it before, we’ll say it again. CNN should pivot (we hate that word) to the middle of the political spectrum. They lose straight up in nearly every hour in the ratings to MSNBC for left-leaning viewers. They get smashed by the juggernaut that FOX is. In many hours measured MSNBC and CNN combined don’t reach what FOX does. The middle lane is wide open for market share to be taken and we sense America is wide open for some middle-of-the-road thinking.
claims about performance bonuses for losses. “I take great personal exception to these malicious attacks, and the truth must be known. His allegations are false, malicious, and defamatory.” Predictable. Flores’ lawyers surely know that the NFL is a tight-knit group of deep pockets with great incentive to defend and plenty of in-house legal counsel to help do just that.
and California Governor Gavin Newsom switched jobs in the middle of the night how long would it take for anyone to notice? Newsom was caught on camera multiple times during the Rams/49ers NFC Championship Game yet again thumbing his non-masked nose at Californians who are under his mandate to mask up while indoors at work, events, and school. He denied doing so. Cameras don’t lie, people do.
Interim head coach Rich Bisaccia is making the go-forward decision for Raiders owner Mark Davis harder by the week. The game got 
Also, why are asymptomatic peeps standing or driving in long lines in the cold to get tested?
announce that she has retained advisors to look into the feasibility for a first run at the big job?
say enough and buy Twitter and Facebook, sorry Metaverse, with the loose change that he has under his sofa cushions?
CNN hires Andrew Cuomo and rehires Chris Cuomo to cohost a new primetime show tentatively called When No One Is Watching.