One of our senior editors fell asleep on the job Saturday.  As a result, the news that may or not be true was not able to be published until this morning.

Not to worry, BBR is a caring organization.  We gave our editor a raise and a pat on the back for a nice try and give you the somewhat late, but still worthy news of note.

Elon Musk announced that the $7/month cost for blue check mark verification would indeed start on April 1st.  Additionally, he announced that beginning May 1 conservatives that subscribe will be paid $7 a month for red check mark verifications citing a need for diversity.  The New York Times said it is now identifying as a conservative organization.

Phillip Morris International owns the Marlboro cigarette brand.  They’re joining M&M Mars and Disney in their efforts to welcome one and welcome all.  PMI announced Saturday that the Marlboro Man campaign has been replaced and new commercials will feature a Marlboro They person.

Joe Biden flew in and sympathized with the citizens of tornado-ravaged Rolling Fork, Mississippi.  He promised that the federal government would do all that it could to help “Rolling Stone” rebuild. He went on to say that April’s Fool Day has always been one of his very favorite days of the year.

Kamala Harris unexpectedly extended her African trip by a day to head out on a safari trip.   On it, she asked guides if lions were female tigers.

St. Peter did his job at the pearly gates.  He told Audrey Hale to “go to hell.”  Alexandria Ocassio Cortez has asked the Department of Justice to open an investigation of St. Peter for a possible hate speech crime.

Mitch McConnell asked House Speaker Kevin McCarthy to begin drafting articles of impeachment against Donald Trump for early 2025 in the unlikely event that he gets elected.

A San Francisco City Council member asked the other members in a meeting if reparations should be considered for all citizens, not just Black ones.  “We embrace and celebrate equality and inclusion in our great city.  To leave out anyone would be against our values,” he/him said.   A vote will be taken next week.

In Oregon drag kings are suing the state for unfair hiring practices.  “Drag queens are getting all of the jobs in our state-funded schools,” a king spokesperson shrieked.  “We only want what is flair, I mean fair,” he concluded.

One other bit of news of note is only a day late.  A freight train derailed in Paradise, Montana, on Sunday.  The train derailed on the banks of the Clark Fork River.  Some of the cars spilled into the river.  Secretary of Transportation Pete Buttigieg, criticized for taking too long to get to the East Palestine, Ohio derailment, contemplated peddling his bike from DC to assess the situation.  Instead, he chartered a private jet and got two tickets to Paradise.

Somewhere Eddie Money is shaking his head over all of this.